My wife had to travel to Texas for approximately five days due to a death in the family. That meant I was going to be at home with our three little children for five days on my own. These five days gave me an opportunity to think about the difficulty that single parents endure week in and week out. I understand that single parenting is not the ideal according to God's design. God's established the family to consist of a husband and a wife (Gen. 2:23-25). God designed the family as a husband and a wife parenting their children in accordance with God's instructions together (Ex. 20:12, Eph. 6:1-4). However, we live in a fallen world that has been corrupted by sin (Gen. 3).
Single parents are my heroes and heroines. Over these last five days, I made three observations about single parents that convinced me that the church should come alongside single parents to help them in their God given task to raise their children. Moreover, the gospel remains essential for single parents just as much as the gospel remains essential to traditional families.
For example, single moms trying to raise children must understand that their faith in Jesus Christ places them in a relationship with God, and God exists as their Heavenly Father. Psalm 68:5 reads, "Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation." Therefore, a single mom ought to let her children know that there is a Heavenly Father that will always be there, loves them, values them, gives them strength, and helps them throughout the trials of life. This applies to believers as well. The gospel brings hope, peace, and encouragement to all people in all stages of life.
The three observations that I made over the course of these five days are:
Observation 1) Single parents have no time for themselves. A single parent has to do the work designed for two people. Single parents have to do the daily chores to keep the house in order, work to provide financially for their family, take the children to school, take care of children when they are sick, cook dinner, put them to bed, get them clean, and any other task that must be done. They don't have much time just for them. The more children and the younger the children they have means they may not get a chance to sit down until the kids are in bed. When they do get to sit down, they are exhausted from the days activities, and most likely ready for bed too.
Observation 2) Single parents have to work through difficult situations. If a single parent gets sick, they do not get the opportunity to just go lay in bed to get rest and heal. They are still responsible for their child or children. A single parent has to provide financially for their children, take care of children, and do chores around the house, but when they get sick, these responsibilities continue. Single parents have to work long hours to provide for their children and take care of their children. Simple tasks like mowing the grass become difficult situations because they have to figure out what to do with the children during that time.
Observation 3) Single parents can't attend all the events they desire to. A single parent that works six days a week, may not have time to go to every church service on Sunday. A single parent that has a relationship with Christ desires to spend time with the family of God in worship on Sundays, but a single parent working six days a week only has one day to get ready for the upcoming week. They have to go to the grocery store, get laundry done, clean dishes, get homework done, and any other task that must be completed in order to be prepared for the upcoming six days. Christians want to spend time with the people of God. However, single parents may not have the time to attend all the events a church provides and they desire to attend because they have an abundance of tasks to complete before the work week begins.
Single parents you are my heroes and heroines. These past five days opened my eyes to the struggles and trials you endure on a daily and weekly basis. You are not an outcast from the family of God because you are a single parent. You are a brother and sister in Christ. Your identity is in Christ through the gospel. The family of God should come alongside single parents, and think of ways to relieve some of these tasks single parents endure. The family of God can mow grass, pick up a child from school, watch the children so the parent can go out, provide love to the parent and the children, and encourage their brothers and sisters in Christ. The gospel makes us a family, and as a family, we should build each other up and help each other out.
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